I had a whole other label and name for this beer but it got shelved when the world went crazy the day prior to packaging. I’ll reuse it later though, it was pretty cool.

I know this is going to put noses out of joint, but I don’t care. Hugo Chavez was cool. This is not Nicolas Maduro on the label, I have already had people yell at me about that. I don’t like him quite as much, but it is insane that the global capitalist empire can decide that a democratically elected leader should be disappeared.

Now, before you get angry about that last bit - Maduro was elected in 2013 after the death of Chavez. Nobody disputed that.

In 2017 he won re-election in a historically low turn out, as the wheels were coming off for the Venezuelan economy. He had lost control of the legislature to the opposition, and had failed to implement his social reforms, so his base didn’t support him and Chavismo as much as they had previously. He was no Chavez.

This was disputed as a fraudelent election, with the initial accusations coming from the same folks that brayed about WMDs in Iraq - The Atlantic Council, New York Times, and various CIA fronts.

Forgive me if I don’t take their word on it.

The primary complaint was that the polling stations were open longer than their usual closing time, which doesn’t strike me as particularly undemocratic. More voters get a chance to vote, oh no.

in 2018, the US tried to coup him and install the leader of the opposition in his place, Juan Guaido. This was widely regarded as a bad idea, so they doubled down and threatened to invade. John Bolton lead the charge here, but he failed because he is a bloodthirsty loser.

Juan Guaido is also a loser, his coup attempt disintegrated into a bunch of poorly attended protests, and he fled to Spain to be the self-appointed President in Exile. By 2023 the US decided he wasn’t really the President of Venezuela after all.

All the rich Venezuelans left the country, as it was getting pretty bad. Food shortages caused a health crisis as Venezuelans lost a lot of weight. However, the rich folks (who are now very vocal expats) were overwhelmingly in favour of the opposition, so the loss of these folks really only helped Maduro’s numbers in the next election.

Fast forward to now - Trump is back and he’s got nothing to lose. On top of that, they’ve got this guy in prison called Hugo Carvajal Barrios. This guy is the key witness of the DOJ case against Maduro.

He was a military intelligence officer, who got exiled by Maduro for supporting Guaido and his little failed coup. He fled to Spain to go hang out with his buddy, until the US extradited him for - get this - narcoterrorism.

This guy will say anything to get out of prison (which, ya know, fair enough). He claims that Maduro also helped rig the 2020 election and caused Biden to defeat the democratically elected Donald J Trump, which of course is a very popular idea with the current US regime. This claim has been proven false in court, with Fox News being forced to pay $780 million in damages for claiming it.

Super trustworthy guy.

But let’s say it is all true - Trump is right, and Maduro is a narco terrorist and dictator instead of just a kinda shitty economic leader following in the footsteps of a generational political talent - Who did they choose to replace him?

Not the leader of the opposition. Not the CIA funded woman who begged America to bomb her country and subsequently stole Trump’s peace prize (and my heart). Not even anyone from the opposition at all.

The VP, Delcy Rodriguez. She first got into politics to avenge her father, a Marxist-Leninist guerilla leader who was tortured to death by the US backed regime in the 70s. She is a Chavista, and since 2018 has headed the Venezuelan intelligence agency SEBIN, described as a “secret police” by the Organisation of American States (based in Washington).

To summarize the official narrative of the Trump Admin - Maduro is a narcoterrorist and dictator, as claimed by another narcoterrorist, so we must kidnap and replace him with the chief spy of his dictatorship’s secret police. That’s regime change in the rules-based order, baby.

Get the fuck out of here.

Enjoy the beer I guess.